Getting Through the Hard and Harder
Divorce & Death of a Partner Transitions
Grief is a huge bastard that takes over people’s lives. How are you supposed to figure out how to cope through a divorce or partner’s death when you have kids to worry about? If you can’t take care of yourself, if you don’t know yourself anymore or the way your life will/should look, how are you supposed to be a rock for your kids?
When going through a divorce or death of a partner, it’s hard enough to think about your own changes, let alone how to be an example. With huge changes comes the need to reconfigure how you want to parent. We will develop a parenting plan that addresses your personal needs, what you want family to look like, what changes you’ll need to make and ultimately, how to keep kids close during a tumultuous process.
What We Work On :
Your Kids didn’t choose this.
How to hold space for their feelings so they can express what they are experiencing. You don’t have to fix this you just need to listen (easier said than done)
What’s different. What do I want my family to look like now that it doesn’t resemble what I thought it would be.
Unloading too much on your kids.
Be vulnerable, yes, share your sadness and you too are feeling sad and some fear and at the same time your kids are not your new partner. I know it is hard not having your person their to talk with, that is where coaching comes in. you need to have an adult to talk with that you can share the fears and the angers and the unfairness of it all so that you can continue on the plan and cultivating the new normal.
How to keep kids close during process.
Whether it is having Family dinners every night or connecting with an activity it is super important to keep the connection with your kids . You deserve it and so do they. It is hard to engage in connection when we are still stuck in “ It wasn’t supposed to look like this” we can create the new and it can feel calm and connective.
Allowing you to vent and move past anger at ex’s..
Kids do not ever want to hear their other parent being bashed. Learning to take the high road is not easy , you will slip and we start again. You don’t need to tell them your side of the story. More times than not kids rarely care why their parents got a divorce , they don’t need or always want to know they just want to know they have parents who love them.